Mental health plays an equal and important role as much as physical health in setting up good health and it is still often seen as a Taboo to have conversations around it. People are less scared to let out their issues related to physical health but are more scared when it comes to mental health? There might be many reasons for this. But, among most people I’ve seen including me, one reason somewhere down the line is “because they would be judged or people talk about us or people might misunderstand and we will be left all alone”. Judging or being judged is the most common thing that happens around us. Probably we don’t even realize that we are judging someone and it might hurt the opposite person even though it was not intentional.
I was always pretty scared about being judged. Childhood is a very important phase in anyone’s life. Not just the family, each and everyone around a child can influence them and make impressions that can last a lifetime. Only if I got to know when I was a child, that it is really okay if I can’t understand academics, or don’t have to hurt myself or others just to please someone else, or it is really okay to be dumb and can’t understand things quickly maybe I would have been in a different position now. And without knowing, just because I was following the same patterns, I too started judging people unintentionally. Later too much stress and anxiety damaged my physical health and this phase was still the worst. One was about the physical health issues at a very young age, second people either compared me with others or my issue has just been a fun topic to them. No one took it seriously. I didn’t know what to do and I started making fun of myself so that when others bully me, I won’t feel bad, because deep down somewhere I have already tricked my mind. And like adding fuel to the fire, my lifestyle entered into the scene, which made things even worse. After all this, I realized the pain that others will be going through when I judged them even unintentionally. From then at least I’ve been conscious of not judging quickly. And I started giving back strong replies to things if I wasn’t okay. If I felt that people can’t understand my point, I started moving away from them rather than sitting and debating. I still get anxiety attacks because of the choices I have made when I was really low. But it is really okay, and if you have a family who can understand you, then that plays a major role in healing 🙂
It is really okay to express your views out or tell others if you feel that they are doing wrong, but the only thing we have to make sure is that it is not hurting them, rather try to make them understand about pros and cons. Also, we might not always be right. If the opposite person is not doing that is right according to you, you always have the right to express your view in a softer tone, and at the same time, they have their right to go ahead with their view. And, if something goes wrong and it did not work the way they thought, stand with them and tell them that it’s okay to make mistakes, but it’s more important to not repeat them. Don’t let anyone feel scared to share their emotions with you. They come to you only if they feel that of all the people they know, you are that person whom they can share and rely upon. Comparisons play a great role in judging people. Not everyone might be like your parents, brothers, sisters or even you. Everyone has their own identity. Don’t let their identity vanish by comparing.
I sometimes feel, all these together made me a better person. To stay strong (at least better than earlier) and to understand the pain of others even though I am still not very good at consoling people. Let’s try to stay without judging others, and if possible try to uplift their confidence. And the important thing is it is really okay and normal if you have psychological issues, and there is nothing to feel shy or embarrassed in taking the help of a psychologist or a psychiatrist. No gender is an exception, anyone can have an emotional breakdown and it is okay to accept and seek support.
Life is too short to stay sad and nothing should keep us from being happy! Stay Positive and Stay Happy!
Hats off to you for breaking your shell of what others think about you. There are still many people who are stuck up with this fear. Any person would be successful only when they get rid of this fear. Way to go!!!
Thank you!! Yes, the main reason for me to write down my experience is that it might help someone else like me to break their silence and come out of it ?